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Self image has been scrutinized by psychologists and philosophers alike for centuries. Even though there are many arguments as to what self image is exactly, people will agree that self image has much to do with how a person feels about him/herself. Some would say that self image means how a person views himself in the world. What a person does everyday – their job, how they treat others, how attractive they are to others – hinges on their self image. Some people have positive perceptions of themselves, while others do not. It is believed that people who have positive perceptions of themselves have been told they are good, or useful. Those who are constantly told they aren’t good or useful, have negative perceptions of themselves.

This leads to another definition of self image which is how others view a person. If others do not enjoy a person’s company, the person may develop a poor self image. If other people do not find a person attractive, the person may suffer from poor self image. People often put too much emphasis on what others think about them. It is important to remember that one’s self image will change throughout their lifetime. They begin to rely less on what others think about them as they mature and find hobbies and social groups that accept them. Their perception changes as they become more educated. Learning a skill or learning more about the world can have a positive impact on a person’s self esteem.

Sometimes, though, a person needs counseling in order to develop a positive self image. This is very common among women and teenagers. Fashion magazines show women that are perfect when in reality they are not. Some women feel they cannot live up to these expectations and become depressed. Teenagers feel the same way when they compare themselves to others in their peer group. Unrealistic comparisons like these are dangerous. They can lead to eating disorders, disruptive behavior, and eventually drug or alcohol abuse. Talking with a therapist can sometimes make a person realize that they do not have to compare themselves to others. Their self image improves and they can lead happy lives.

Self image needs to be nurtured. Everyone feels less than perfect sometimes. But most people recover and go on with their lives. But some people cannot let go of these bad feelings as easily. Their self image is so unrealistic, they make themselves sick and need professional help and advice in order to gain the strength needed to get past those bead feelings.

There are a lot of things which may contribute to possessing a self-defeat attitude. These factors may include stress, depression, anxiety or even an awful life event. There are a lot of people who turn to having this kind of behavior once they are faced with challenges however; doing so will not solve anything.

It will just make things worse instead. Here are some steps on how to change this behavior and exhibit a personality which has self-control especially in times of hardships.

1. Attitude Is Important

How you respond to certain stimuli is the main factor which defines you as a person. They said, you are given problems which only you can solve. This may be easy to say but it is very hard to accomplish. You need to have a positive attitude in everything that will happen in your life. This will require changing your views. You need to remember that how you deal with situations will affect your present and your future in ways you could never imagine.

2. Accept that it’s Your Mistake

Whenever you go through troubles, you will normally blame others for the things that had happened to you. This is very common for those who have an attitude of self-defeat. They are not willing to be accountable for what is happening in their own life. They put the blame on someone else.

If you wish to have self-control in your life, then you need to have a sense of accountability. You need to bear in mind that you are the captain of your ship you must take responsibility for all the actions which you are taking and you need to be ready for whatever the outcomes of those actions will be.

3. Control Your Anger

If you have a self-damaging behavior, you will either suppress your anger or you can also constantly let it loose with no regard to the feelings of other people that surrounds you. Having self-control means that you need to be honest with how you feel and accept this feeling as a part of your human nature. It is alright to be angry but you must never vent out on other people. Learn how to control by finding its source and know how to tame it.

4. Be Contented

Having self-control means that you also have to be contented with what you have right now. You do not have to constantly ask for unrealistic things or event that will not likely happen. Stop dwelling in your own shortcomings but instead try to figure out how you can make the most out of your life and how to reach your full potential.

5. Express Your Feelings

Learning how to express your feelings is a sign that you are starting to have self-control. However, you need to make sure that you know when and where to do it. Unloading your emotional stress is one good way of helping you cope with your life’s daily stressors. You just need to find the right way to do it.